Yinz Jagoffs need tuh Give N'at!

Well hello huddled masses yearning to eat bees. That was some weekend huh? 48 hours sammiched between 5 day chunks of mediocrity. It's important to remember when working for Big Brother to give to those less fortunate. Even when Big Brother is giving you an Atomic Wedgie, you should take a moment to reflect and help when you can, especially when it earns you those oh so needed community service hours mandated by the state. Luckily, I work for a major financial institution that not only gives me the chance to help out my community, it demands it! Now for the sake of those who aren't able to accompany me to work on a day basis, I took a few shots of our latest attempt at public relations.

Help this kid fill her backpack. Don't be a douche, just help the kid out. Dad's gone, Mom's working 3 jobs and Grandma ain't getting around to well after that 3rd hip replacement, so just help the fuckin' kid out alright!?

Fine, I will help her out, Jesus, what's she need?

Glad you asked...

Ok, let's take a look see shall we?
Art supplies. Ok cool.
Construction paper(also falls under art supplies).
Chubby? Crayons and pencils (still fuckin art supplies in my book, unless the playground is more like a prison yard, then that shank costs 2 packs of smokes).
Jump rope (to alleviate the weight gained by using chubby crayons),
Chubby Bats and balls?!(will be provided by the Union of Sex Workers Local I69).
Backpacks. Backpacks? Is she filling her backpack with another backpack? That greedy bitch is going shoplifting.
Gender Neutral Clothing. Because individuality leads to being a whore.
Let's skip down to the last 4. Hand held mirrors. Large plastic tweezers. Eye droppers. Small plastic spray bottles. Childrens, meet your new teacher.

Class Dismissed!

BTW if you enjoy this blog let me know. If you don't, eat a sack of baby dicks.